Jan
At First Glance
Since I haven’t finished reading the book I’d planned to use for today’s ”Reading Tuesday,” I figured we could talk a little about SEW DEADLY. 
As always, you don’t have to have read the book to participate in our chat (though, I hope you have…because it’s a fun book). 
Here’s a tiny taste of the story via the backcover copy.
Ever since she moved to Sweet Briar, South Carolina, Tori’s been the talk of the tiny town. But she’s been so busy adding a children’s corner to the library, winning over the women of the sewing circle, and trying to forget her cheating ex that she hasn’t had time to even baste together a pillow, never mind pay attention to local gossip. Then she finds the town sweetheart dead at her back door, and everything else falls by the wayside…
Everyone believes the police investigator, who’s just fixin’ to link Tori to the murder in a love triangle gone bad through a handsome third grade teacher. To clear her name, Tori will have to rely on her new sewing sisters and stitch together the truth–or else she’ll be darned…
One of the parts that made this story so much fun to write was the notion of being a fish out of water simply because you moved to a place where everyone knows everyone (except you). The kind of place where a newcomer is not only easy to spot, but also studied…
And analyzed…
And judged.
All because they’re ”new” or “different.”
So here are my questions for all of you. Have you ever moved to a new place? Did you feel out of place and why? And what did you do to make yourself fit? And, if you’ve never moved, have you ever been wary of someone because they’re new? Have you ever reached out to a newcomer and if so, how did it go? And finally, as is the case with Tori, has there ever been a moment in your life where you’ve either proved someone wrong about you…or realized you were wrong about someone else?
~Elizabeth
January 26th, 2010 at 8:21 am
As a kid I always was the new kid even though I was at Kuna from third grade on. All the other kids had started school together. When a new girl showed up in seventh grade, I thought here’s my chance to have a friend. But she was one of the cheerleaders cousins. The good news is we still became close friends even if it wasn’t my ticket into the popular group.
Now I realized that you make the friends you are supposed to have not the ones you think you need.
Lynn
January 26th, 2010 at 9:21 am
One of the best things I did after we moved to Iowa was to join the city rec. center. I go almost every day (M-F). I’ve made friends with people from diffferent neighborhoods and made better friends with people from my neighborhood. I also try to go to our neighborhood Bunco game. It’s, basically, a ladies night out.
We have a lot of John Deer employees in our neighborhood and a few months ago about six families were transferred. So now we have lots of new neighbors. I’ve made an effort to try and help them become part of their new neighborhood. I’ve blown their snow, gone out to lunch with them, and stopped in with a neighborhood phone directory. Hopefully, I’ve made them feel as welcomed as our old (LOL) neighbors made us feel when we moved here 18 months ago.
January 26th, 2010 at 9:58 am
My biggest change was moving from CT to Atlanta, GA. A couple of years after moving we bought a house and 3 days later got hit with the blizzard of 93. A foot of snow. Being a Yankee, I got up, shoveled the driveway and called my boss. I told him I’d be in when the plows came through. Yeah, he laughed. Two days later everything finally melted and we could go to work.
Fast forward 6 months and I’ve now met most of my neighbors. We’ve been drinking a few cocktails one night and one of my neighbors says: ‘We hated you when you moved in’. I was in shock, but he continued. ‘Remember the snow storm? How you got up and shoveled your driveway? Well our wives woke most of us up and made us get out there too. Mine said ‘see, the new kid is doing it, get up’”. 20 years of Damn Yankee comments later we’re still here.
My favorite story about the ‘new kid’ was told to me last weekend by the mother of a new friend of my youngest daughter. She started middle school this year and it seems that there was a new girl that she started talking to a lunch. Courtney mentioned this girl a couple of times but I didn’t think anything of it.
Turns out that the new girl transferred from Catholic elementary school to a new public middle school and didn’t know anyone. She went home in tears the first couple of days because no one talked to her. Until Courtney sat down with her at lunch and just started talking (and talking and talking I’m sure). I guess my kids did listen when we taught them to be nice to everyone
January 26th, 2010 at 9:59 am
When you start a new job, you’re definitely the newcomer and you are on display to see whether you’ll fit in. Friendships have already been made and what I tend to do is say “hi” and “can I help you” to the newcomers. Eventually they’ll feel like they’ve worked here long.
January 26th, 2010 at 12:47 pm
Lynn, I like that last sentence you wrote. Kind of makes you think. I remember one friend I had for about a year or two. We had a lot of fun together. Stuck by her through some tough stuff in her personal life. But when she moved on, she drifted away. For a week or so it kind of stung. But then I realized that people come and go in our lives at times we need them. She needed me at the time we were friends. If I helped her through a tough time and that’s all I was meant to do/be…then I’m okay with that.
Sharon, I think it’s neat that you’re now paying it forward to new people in our area. Very nice.
LOL, Chris on the shoveling. LOL! And yeah, teaching our kids to be nice is huge. Keeps the niceness going…
Dru, I bet they appreciate the offer to help!
I’ve moved many, many times. And through all that moving I’ve learned never to box someone into a place or a career or a marriage status. And by avoiding that–and being open to whatever–I’ve done okay.
January 26th, 2010 at 2:41 pm
Ditto what Dru said. A lot of scratchin’ and sniffin’ and markin’ of territory goes on in the workplace. And then, once the pecking order is established, the hire someone new and it starts anew.
I usually get a pretty good handle on folks after a couple conversations. But I did completely blow it once.
New job. I’d been there eight months. My boss was a very nice guy, a numbers nerd, very button down and critical analytical.
Or so I thought.
I came in one Saturday to proof our magazine. There was a bike parked outside in his spot. I popped into his office to find he’d shaved his head and was wearing a headscarf. The following weekend, he was off to a biker rally at Sturgis.
You just never know…
January 26th, 2010 at 6:29 pm
Great visuals, Joe! It is kind of odd (yet sometimes fun) when someone completely turns your image upside down. Unless it’s a friend…